How I Wake My Humans

Did you know that if you leave them to it, humans can sleep all morning? I never let them slumber past my feeding time. Here’s a few tricks you can use to rouse your people.

First, there is the affectionate approach. I either lie close to them and purr my brains out, or I lie on top of them. It eases them back to consciousness. I might then lick them, put my paws in their faces, or force them to pet me. By this point, they are awake, but in danger of going back to sleep if they don’t get up. It is thus time to resort to the rougher method.

I run over their heads. This is usually effective. If they still resist the call, I will station myself near something they hold dear, implying that I am about to chew it up. If they don’t react, I act on this threat. Or, I go under the bed and start tearing at the fabric. They absolutely hate that. They know they have to get up or my destructive behavior will continue. Should have gotten up earlier.

I hope these tricks have been helpful to you, fellow cats, or have helped you understand our motivations, dear “owners.” That’s what The Mr. Biscuit Blog is all about.

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