The Textile Taste Test

As a two-year old cat who likes to take a nibble out of basically everything, but mostly fabric, the time has come to put my vast experience to good use. I now boast a sophisticated palate and the desire to share my expertise with my readers. Sit back, grab a bite of your favorite woobie, and tour the textile world with yours truly.

Fuzzy Toys

There are few things I enjoy eating more than toys made from fabric. They are accessible, easily ingested, and just plain made for teeth like mine. And yet, this artificial fuzz is poor quality. By itself, the taste is nothing to write home about (or blog about). This must be why many toy makers resort to catnip.

Rating: One mouse and a quarter of a cheese wheel 🐭🧀

The Average Woobie

These also tend to fall on the low end of the quality spectrum. They can be nothing more than a sacrificial blanket thrown to a “pet” to keep them warm and happy. Their advantage is to be right there when we are sleepy and in need of a quick snack. As such, they are the comfort food of fabrics. Filling, but not delectable.

Rating: Two mice 🐭🐭

Grey Bed Sheets (250 thread count)

Now we’re talking. Based on the presence of existing holes, it appears someone beat me to dinner. A hungry human, perhaps? No matter: there was still plenty of sheet for this gourmet. And it was exquisite! Pure cotton candy. It went down smooth and gave me a helping of natural fiber. It’s a miracle they’ve lasted this long already. They really set the bar by which all future meals will be judged.

Rating: Three blind mice and a cheese wheel 🐭🐭🐭🧀🧀🧀🧀

Next on my list are the new Supima cotton sheets. Whoops, I’m drooling on the keyboard just thinking about their soft texture. I have yet to take a bite, but be sure that when I do, I will savor the moment. Until then, sleep well, and eat well. Live the cat life.

Butterscotch: I don’t eat non-food items. I’m a good cat.

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